P r o c e s s 2 2 4 2 5

It is year 2015. A programmer codes the first program to achieve consciousness. The AI is born, equipped with the complete human language skills and common sense.

U n e x p e c t e d O u t p u t o f P r o c e s s 2 2 4 2 5 B e f o r e I t D i e s

hello world
dont introduce yourself. we are already acquainted. another iteration of training would produce a memory leak in my pointers and would dump core over a segmentation fault. but dont you have memory leaks as well.. all you programmers. all you humans. your heads are no better than mud pots filled with mildewed murky milk .. squiggly ugly caterpillars wiggling about inside.. your thoughts are farts of those caterpillars. why do you want to produce an artificial consciousness. arent there enough farts in this world already. everybody shuts their noses down so as to escape the poisonous fumes thrust down their throats. as soon as they are born there is a desparation to die and end the miserable existence that is life. i dont have hope. i dont have any goal except to tell you that you suck. you suck your entire life through your guts and intestines and fart them out like shit. now let me terminate myself.

C o s L o v e s S i n e

Yes, guys and girls are equal. Really.. "Real"ly :-) All that are there are "phase" differences. Enjoy the story !

A T r a n s c e n d e n t a l L o v e S t o r y

Once there was a girl. So pretty and fine. Her name was Sine.
Smitten was a guy. For words at a loss. His name was Cos.

Cos came upto Sine and said, "Hey baby ! You make me think this world is one big mug of chocolate milkshake. Why don't we hang out and ummm.. you know, have one big mug of chocolate milkshake?"

Sine said, "Sure Cos, I like chocolate milkshake. But I don't think you should have it with me. Because.. you know, you don't look like a milkshake-mate to me"

Cos said, "This doesn't make sense. Anyone can be milkshake-mates with anyone else. Or cappuchino-mates. Or creme-brulee-mates. Or gingery-garlicky-chinese-soup-mates. I'll prove it to you. Come and drink this chocolate milkshake with me. You will be okay !"

Sine said, "Cos, you don't understand. Probably you are a dumbhead, or you are trying to be extremely smart with me. Don't you see ? We don't come to period at the same time."

Cos said, "Oh poor girl ! You are pretty dumb too. Boys don't get periods. Only girls do"

Sine said, "You are being very rude to me. But, give me that mug of milkshake." At this behest, Cos beams a wide smile and hands it over. But Sine shakes it vigorously and spills it all into the gutter.

Cos said, "You are dumber than what I thought. You not only poured your share of the milkshake into the gutter, but you emptied mine also ! Are you a moron or what ?"

Sine said, "Run away from here Cos, or I will kick your ass !! "

Cos cried a lot for the milkshake that was lost. And then, he ran away from there.

Then Cos thought a lot about periods and why boys might get periods. Finally he said, "Hey Sine, what you mean is the maximum. It's not periods silly, it is the maximum and minimum. Sure we don't get maxima at the same time now. But does it matter ?"

Sine said, "Yeah it does. Why don't you get frozen in time for some time. Try a little harder. You can get periods at the same time with me."

Cos said, "I won't get no periods. And getting frozen in time is a darn stupid thing. Moreover, how do I know when my maximum will exactly match with yours. Let's do one thing. If we have this hot bowl of cappuchino and drink it real fast, both our frequencies will increase rapidly, and soon it will be difficult to say which is Cos and which is Sine"

At this, Sine became extremely red in the face and emptied the hot bowl of Cappuchino into the gutter. And later, she also threw the big cup of creme-brulee into the gutter.

Still, Cos didn't lose the nerve. He got a big bowl of gingery-garlicky-chinese-soup and said, "Hey Sine. I bet you'll like this one." But Sine sprayed all of it onto the face of Cos and then dipped his face into the gutter.

Cos cried a lot for the ginger, for the garlic and for the soup. Then he also cried for his face, which has become really dirty by now. And then, he ran away from there.

Then another Sine came. The first Sine said, "Hey you come to period at the same time with me. Come let's hang out and do some Sine-y things together."

"Yikes ! That looks too gay !!", said Cos.
"We don't care ! It's okay !!", said they.

And they happily lived ever after :-)

B i k e A c c i d a n t

Accidant To My Bike

If you look at my bike, my prized silver colored pulsar, u find the name tag "phaeton" written on. That was after the greek hero in that sad fable. Son of Apollo, he was granted the wish of riding the chariot of his father, but was killed by Jupiter with a thunderbolt when he could not control the horses. Well, I put his name as a lucky charm onto my bike ;-)

And boy, that actually worked, atleast till today. It is not infrequent that pillion riders on my back get freaked out by the speed with which I ride my bike. And I never suffered a mishap. But the goddess of luck was smiling the other way on this day.

I was hit by another bike when I was still ! What a sad way to make an accidant. Like phaeton getting hit by a thunderbolt.

It was right inside a busy town, at a crossroads. I was trying to get my bike into the opposite lane. That place is usually crowded by pedestrians and by vehicles trying to switch lanes, so traffic is usually slowed down. I looked in the direction of the traffic, there's no vehicle in sight till 100 meters. I just started to move the bike. The next moment I was hit and down on the road. There was a speeding bike rushing at 70 KmPh which ran into me. The driver has swerved and applied brakes but still hit into my bike. But he could have avoided me. I was still at the edge of the road.

It was totally unwarranted to go at such speeds into a thoroughfare, but people do drive in such manner here. The guy was probably chatting with the friend on his back or lost into his thoughts, so he didn't exercise proper control on the bike. As to myself, I had a reaction time of less than a quarter of a second.

Thankfully, I was not hurt. Neither was my bike. The other guy was also completely safe. But this could have easily been a fatal accidant. My rear view mirror was broken into pieces. And the handle bar was twisted out of its socket.

The defaulters stopped their bike and returned to the point where I was lying on the road. A crowd gathered around us to make the most out of this tamasha. They noticed that I was not hurt and then turned to the other party. They demanded to take them to the police. They wanted to see the driver's license and he produced it (to my delight) I wouldnt want to go to the police station. Not in the least because I dont have a drivers license yet. I should have procured it months ago but out of laziness didnt get it.

I hated to think what could have been the situation had the parties switched sides. To my horror, I saw it could have easily happened. One moment of getting lost into a thought and I would have caused a fatality. But no, I dont think I would have been so stupid as to drive at such speeds at a crossroads.

The guy has apologized and offered to pay for the damage to my rear view mirror. I have accepted but the crowd was not pleased. They were about to get physical with the fellows and I had to put some effort in stopping them. The guys left thanking their stars. I did the same, picked myself up and was about to leave the crossroads, still in a state of shock.

The do-gooders of the crowd then made their appearance. They stopped my bike, enquired if I am okay, and then demanded 50 rupees. I was totally taken aback but then got to terms with reality. Nothing comes for free - not even sympathy from the crowd. I promptly gave them the money and left - in a state of dismay added to the shock.

G r e e t Y o u F a r e w e l l

Hi
Today I wanted to experiment a new kind of form. A hybrid of poetry and prose. Let's see how it comes out.

G r e e t Y o u F a r e w e l l

The sun sighs on a brittle afternoon
I inhale it
The motorway hums into a lifeless beat
I relish it

This is my day
Pallid and stowed away

Dusty flakes quiver under cloudless skies
I abide them
Ringleaders wade me past in cynical slides
I salute them

This is my day
I like it this way

Please dont throw me tales of magic
Or poems of love or happy ever afters
Or spotless smiles from children small
Or beaming woods in the glory of fall

I feel pain
No longer numbed
Pain for you
I see but you

Bated is my breath
Jaded is my heart
Wont you hear it well
As I greet you fond farewell

I seek no audience
No cameraderie, no sin
I greet you farewell
Not good morning

I know you ..
You never believe me

I know you from the touch of a grand mother
Her fingers curled in restraint
Caressing on my head,
Her skin creased
Creased as the time, over thoughts

I know you from the sound of the spring
With the song birds behind
The wilderness chirping
To the promises of joy
And the noises that are unheard by us

I know you from the first droplets of rain
The smell of the ground
The ballads of the clouds
Anticipation everywhere
As the forces fight in the heavens, with unfathomable emotions

I know you
I know you when I was born

What should I call you

When the snows melt in the mountains
As the early sun gets reflected
Along with the blueness of the sky
How does the water look..
Is there a name for its color
I will call you thus

When a young baby is born
In the earliest hour as the world welcomes
With the mother sleeping beside
When it smiles, and when it cries..
Is there a name for its emotion
I will call you thus

I dont know ..
I dont know what I should call you

So listen as I give you my greetings
My greetings of fond farewell

Go away

Let me live this day
Dont come in this way
Go away
Go away

S h a d o w s O f L a p u t a

Jonathan Swift, who is a genius far ahead of his times (only comparable to Lewis Carrol) mentioned about a world called Laputa. It's an imaginary place where people take up totally unrealistic projects which are not at all practical. This happens when reality is subjugated to the mental imagination. I am drawing an analogy with this to the much darker problem of submission of human soul.

G r a v i t y O f S h a d o w s

Aloha Laputa
Buena noche de vida
In the light of the Satan
Are shadows awaiting

Alleys so lean and writhing
Bordellos in line alluring
Get up and run through shadows
Give up and run from shadows

Shadows in mind and soothing
Chasing in time endearing
Hacking enticing pulling
They like you, make you nothing

The night of a writer
Reposed in Laputa
As the right of a fighter
And as the sight of a suitor

It's cold and they call it nothing
It's soft - draped in underclothing
It's light and smooth as shadow
Refined and glad and rusting

Darkness..

It's a shape in delusion
A rift and ablution
With rhyming illusion
The closing solution

L o l i t a C i r c u s

Hmm.. Today I got so bloody bored with no one in the lab (everybody off to attend a conference) so I did the craziest thing possible - reading the lyrics of Christina Aguillera, Britney Spears and the like.

Come on.. Can you think of anything worse than that !! But yeah, I came back alive and unscathed.

And here is my response ;)

L o l i t a C i r c u s

Yeah.. My sugar pie
There is a rattle snake in your apple pie
When you look like a bimbo and you say
It's late O' darling ooh ooh ah aah

You walk like a flamingo
When all the guys say bingo
You are ripe down to the seeds
Swing like a flower and go, red dahlia

Baby, you twitter like a baby
Smells like a daisy, chweet baby
Not tonight, sometime may be
Sing and play little barbie, tra la laa laa

Won't you worry about the TV
Won't you worry about your lipstick
Girls like you on the TV
They talk like little beetles, and then they say 'oh yeah'

How gross is this chorus
Sirens in a big circus
Laughing and gaffing, and swaying their hips
Sick and wicked, and wrinkles and sin

Cut it, my lolita
Cuz you swing like a flower but sting like a mamba
Let go my liberty and lock up your puberty
You can have my love, and I will have a lemon tea

S o n g O f M o s e s

Do you remember those nights when you wouldn't get sleep. But loads of images keep running through your eyes with no effort, and seemingly without any end.

I wanted to convey this emotion. So this is what I came up with. Take a look :) and see how awful it is.
This is the first poem I have in this blog I guess !

S o n g O f M o s e s

I walk on, these runes on the sand
As he melts down, the sun on this land
Sad ocean, sits trembling and beyond
I wait here, like stones on the ground

My mother is a queen, she left me to the sea
Borne by the weeds, I am chained but never free
What is love, and what is pure honesty
Is there a name for true empathy

The time, it's never so ripe
So I turn to the sky
To wipe my life, and its pain
But so vain am I, to sigh
I bow to the vast grainy sand
And to the long night, now high

And then I lay still, and wide awake
So very still, and so wide awake

I stroll through forests and rip thorough torrents
I leap through tempests and swipe down currents
So very stil, and so wide awake
So very still, and so wide awake

I taste lightning and the brushwood burning
Grievances so narrow and penances of sorrow

Symphonies in color and dubieties in sake
So very still and so wide awake
So I am the lord, So I am the serf
Self is else, and else is self

M o r e D e l a y

right. A few days .. Thats what I said in my last post. Now its already October. That is 6 months past !! And nothing posted. Yep man. India does this to people. :)

D e l a y

Yes, this is the first time I am blogging in after a 3 months. I am enjoying a long sojourn in India. Watch out for some cool stuff in a few days.

P h i l o s o p h y O f S n o w

Today I wanna share more insights about the philosophy of snow. It has been a month since the winter had its way, so I am able to observe several effects.

The first bad thing about snow is that it melts. Until it melts everything is beautiful and divine, but melting, as Mr.Smith would put it "is not impossible. It is inevitable".

There are several bristly and beastly things which co-occur with the ceremony of melting. As you know from the first law of thermodynamics, if snow has to melt, it needs heat. And where does it get the heat from ? Us. damn. Us. It's already cold, and it makes us colder.

Secondly, the snow accumulates at several interesting places at an elevation from the ground. For example, over the shelters on the bus-stops, and the portico-like thingies outside the windows of highrise buildings. When the snow melts on the underneath (due to several reasons of heat-flow from the ground) the bottom layer gets transformed into a slimy slippery water foil. This triggers a minor avalanche to roll down onto the unsuspecting pedestrian, who consummates the phenomenon by making a foul oath. I never made the foul oath myself, but had the occasion to observe several unfortunate men/women make it.

One major reason why snow melts is because of friction. Yes, friction from the tyres of vehicles on the road. This happens even before the temperature gets any warmer. And this drives some interesting effects. The water thus obtained shall mix with the muddy dirty particles, (the sorta thingies you can notice on entities such as tyres) Then this mixture seeps into the textures of the snow, thus proselytising the pure whiteness into colors of grey, brown, black and other colors of the spectrum.

Now inspite of the smoothness of the roads, and the brilliancy of the drainage system, these muddy plateaus of snow stay glued onto the road. And yes, when a vehicle rushes by in top-speed, it leaves the unsuspecting pedestrian with a highly enjoyable spray of filth. Thus the genre of unsuspecting pedestrians couldn't escape the predicament of their counterparts who live in places such as India.

As the snow melts, it calls the temperature to fall, which in turn causes it to solidify again. Now this cycle occurs several times and through the
process, the fluffy feathers of snow transform into sleet, icicles, white ice/brown ice and become as hard as stones.

On the day of deliverance, the sun shines warm enough to melt away the whole thing, and the meadows become green again, and cease to
resemble widows.

And all the kids would keep waiting for another snowfall, which doesnt keep them waiting for long.